


Guess who is alive?

by Mepoe, Nylaysu



Series: Of spies and heroes and their shenanigans [2]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: At least some people knock at the door, Daisy and Koenig do not deserve this, Darcy is Amazing, May not reacting to an avenger multiple times, Part 2 of Of spies and heroes and their shenanigans, Phil coulson is alive!, Post-Episode: s03e10 Maveth, Security systems that are not secure anymore, Skye | Daisy Johnson is still a hacker, Tony Being Tony, We love messing with Coulson, but not really, fitzsimmons fangirling, we're sorry for that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-08 02:47:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7740445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mepoe/pseuds/Mepoe, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nylaysu/pseuds/Nylaysu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Pepper had told him, he had thought that she was too tired from working. Tony was nothing if not a scientist, so he did a bit of research. And it wasn’t Pepper’s imagination, it was true, Phil Coulson was alive and he hadn’t said anything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Engineer

**Author's Note:**

> The timeline is between Age of Ultron and Civil war for the movie verse, for the series is just after Maveth.  
> This fanfic will not have pairings. Why? Because some people don’t like them and we want this history to be enjoyable for everyone. For us, Bruce Banner fled at the end of Age of Ultron because ohe feared hurting people (general, not just of hurting Natasha like the movie seems to portray), his returning is caused by his friendship with Tony and the ‘unbelievable, people from SHIELD are more idiots than I thought’ news he has for him.  
> Also this is also a warning for the next one-shots that will come out at some point after this multi-chapter is finished.

After rescuing FitzSimmons from Hydra the team returned with the Zephyr One to the Playground.  
Everyone was relatively happy, but chaos would descend soon.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When Pepper had told him, that she had seen someone that looked exactly like Phil Coulson from afar at her last business trip, he had thought that she was too tired from working. But Tony was nothing if not a scientist, so he did a bit of research.  
That research consisted mostly of having Friday running a facial identification program of all the country’s footage, it didn’t take longer than a few minutes to obtain results.  
There was someone with Agent’s face fooling around since few months after Reindeer Games’ alien attack and, curious enough, he had a team formed with some SHIELD agents and a nameless hacker.  
Now, Tony saw two options: Either the man was a fake and investigation of his objectives were required, or he was the real deal and some upper scallions of what had been SHIELD at the battle of Manhattan needed to give some explanations.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When the Zephyr One landed, Tony turned off the magnets that maintained an Iron Man suit hanging from the plane.  
Tony fell silently and started following maybe-fake-Agent’s team and Friday hacked some systems to grant him access inside the base.  
It was pretty funny. They didn’t notice him walking nonchalantly behind them, but the agents at the sidelines looked at him with bulging eyes.  
One to one maybe-fake-Agent’s team (maybe it needed another name? MFA’s team?) noticed the staring and turned around, their expressions were priceless (though there were two stone-faced women, ugh, spies). MFA continued until he reached the door at the end of the corridor.  
And then, MFA realised that no one was following him, and turned around. Tony would have had a fit of laughter just then if he hadn’t been so angry/curious. His face! Hilarious!  
“Hey MFA! Had you stolen any faces lately?” said Tony sassily.  
“Wha...? Who…?How...?Whe…?” stuttered MFA, then he steadied himself “What are you doing here? And who is MFA?”  
“Checking if you’re real or not, maybe-fake-Agent” said Tony without missing a beat.  
“How would you check that, exactly Mr.Stark?”  
“I can recognize an Agent with a stick up their ass without problem. And I’m starting to suspect that you have that particular stick.” accused Tony.  
MFA’s team had different reactions:  
He-scientist and Hacker Jr. were freaking out, gaping at him.  
Skyscraper and Agent stone-face were, seemingly, indifferent.  
Giant was checking his armor out.  
Scruffy mercenary had his eyes glassed and his mouth agape.  
She-scientist was bouncing in one place, thought she seemed a bit uncomfortable with the conversation.  
“What’s going on?” ventured Skyscraper  
“He is not Agent OR he faked his death” complained (childishly) Tony while he was pointing at MFA.  
“The second one, but not like that, exactly” confessed Agent.  
Tony looked at him mostly confused (though neither MFA nor anyone else saw it).  
“What?” he asked dumbfounded.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

After everything had been explained to Stark (now without the armor) silence fell in the common room.  
“Fuck, baby scientists, you come with me to do some sciencing at my tower!” exclaimed Stark.  
“Yes, yes!” Phil heard that Fitz was muttering under his breath.  
“No.” admonished Phil while he grabbed Fitz’s shoulder.  
“Awww, c’mon Agent!” whined Stark.  
“Is Dr. Banner in the tower? I heard that he lives there” asked Simmons  
Phil had the temptation of face palming. But instead he grabbed Simmons’ shoulder with his prosthetic arm.  
“It’s ‘Director’ now, Mr. Stark” he pointed out.  
“So cyclops gave his sheeps away? So easily?”  
“If it helps Fury ‘died’ first” interjected Hunter.  
“So ‘Director’ why exactly didn’t you tell us you were alive?” retorted Stark while he ignored Hunter.  
“I was ordered to not contact any of you” was the answer.  
“So it was ‘confidential’. What a surprise, the liar that lies orders to not mention that the responsible for the cohesion of the Avengers’ team is not really dead. Did you know that we all went to your funeral? Pepper CRIED” Stark raged.  
“I’m sorry, you don’t know how much, but I couldn’t do anything about that” Phil sounding devastated.  
“Give me a reason to believe that you had no options” requested Stark.  
“I’ve been saving the world with my team after S.H.I.E.L.D. brainwashed me, then I had Hydra to deal with, along Inhumans popping up. Tell me, when, in the middle of all of that, I could have searched for any of you to tell you. Besides, how did you expect that to go, me showing up out of nowhere and say ‘Hey, I’m alive’?”  
“Thor would have cried in happiness. Cap would have avoided a heart attack only thanks to the supersoldier serum. Legolas and Natashalie would have killed you again. Bro… maybe would have had tea with you. And for me...I would have punched you on the face”  
“So everything would have been fine, after months of you believing I was dead?”  
“Have you heard the assassins-duo and my parts?”  
“Yes, but a punch in the face doesn’t sound that bad, after everything I have lived lately...”  
“And the ‘kill you again part’?”  
“I’ve been dead before”  
“Wow, who would have thought that D.C. could sass like that” Skye-Daisy joked.  
“D.C.?” asked Stark turning towards her “By the way wouldn’t you mind to explain why did you hack MY tower a time ago? And how?”  
“Umm.. Aaaa… E..” mumbled Sky-Daisy looking alarmed at Phil, who just nodded at her to answer. “D.C. is Director Coulson. I’m sure that if you look at what files I hacked you’ll know why and it was pretty simple I cracked through a backdoor in your system that allowed me to plant a logic bomb for when you or Jarvis put in your master password and keylogged it from there it was easy just getting to the files I needed”  
Stark whistled “So you passed the firewalls I put in my systems, you passed the firewalls that JARVIS is constantly modifying to stop new kind of attacks”.  
“It wasn’t hard… I mean that system was not as random as it could be, so I used that in my advantage, besides I tried to do the same some months after that and I couldn’t because you changed the algorithm” she explained ”Now, can you tell me how did you enter the base?”  
All the team felt out of the loop there, minus Fitz, who understood more than half of it and was nodding.  
“You are great attacking but I only needed three rootkits to obtain access to your master computer and make it allow me access to the base, if it makes you feel better, it was a zero day exploit”  
“I’ll fix that” Sk-Daisy concluded, already thinking how to improve the security in the system.  
“That explains how you entered our aerial space?” pondered Mack.  
“No” said Stark with a gloating grin.  
“How, then?” asked Fitz.  
“I took a ride on your plane”  
“You took a ride on MY plane” said May drily sending death glare.  
Stark retroceded on his seat, almost slamming his back with it.  
“And I thought Natashalie was scary” then he added “Although Pepper is still the scariest.”  
Then Billy Koenig entered the room, and freezed when he saw Stark, who waved at him almost sheepishly.  
“Umm... I forgot to warn you of his presence…” explained Phil.  
“What I am now? An undesired pet?” blurted out Stark, Phil kicked him lightly, Stark looked at him with a pout.  
“No authorized, out” said Koenig robotically, and started ushering Stark (who had a disbelieving face) out of the room.  
“But we were talking!” he protested.  
“Get authorization first or talk out of the base” retorted Koenig, Stark shot a pleading glance towards the team, it seemed that Fitz wanted to help but Phil stopped him, amused.  
“Ugh… Ok, let me put the suit on” conceded Stark, doing exactly this. Then all of them followed him to the hangar.  
Stark pulled the faceplate up and looked at Phil directly.  
“I’m glad you’re alive, Phil” he confessed, and took off, leaving Phil with his mouth hanging. Had Stark just called him by his name?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“So that’s the situation” explained Tony to Bruce some hours later at the Avengers’ tower.  
“I will not believe it until I see for myself” said Bruce, leaving his travelling bag on a chair “And you should have explained it to Natasha and Clint first.”  
“Then go and see for yourself” said Tony, giving some kind of GPS to Bruce “There, it should mark Agent’s location. And besides, assassin duo is in a mission.”  
Bruce looked at Tony disbelieving.  
“Tony, you know that having a localization device of someone is not precisely etic, right?”  
Tony let out a non-comical sound and waved with his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be published in a week.


	2. Code green

The team was on the bus returning from a mission when a loud crash was heard. Some seconds passed, then, a booming voice was heard:

“COULSON!” it roared.

All the team stopped moving, Phil paled while he looked upwards, were the voice originated from. Meanwhile, May put the Zephyr One on autopilot to go see what the hell was going on. May entered the common area and sent a questioning look to Phil, everyone else doing the same.

Suddenly a low CLANK was heard, and then another, and another, the team turned around to look at the ladder that led to the quinjet entry.

Two naked feet appeared, followed by two legs sparsely clothed with ripped brown pants, and then, when the back (naked) was visible, the man jumped to the ground and turned around, to observe them kindly.

“Hi, Tony said I could find you there” saluted Dr. Banner.

Shaking Fitz’s sleeve Simmons let out a squeal, Banner smiled at her.

Fitz and Daisy were petrified with their mouths agape, looking at him.

May seemed unperturbed but gave off an uneasy air.

Hunter looked terrified, his eyes were wide open and his body was in a defensive stance.

At his side, Bobbi and Mack only raised their eyebrows.

Phil just stared.

“Errrr… Someone has a belt? Or a short rope?” almost pleaded Banner, the knuckles of the hand that was holding his pants were white and his face had turned a red hue.

Simmons darted from her spot towards the rooms where the team slept while in the Zephyr One, coming back in record time with a belt in her hand, she handed it to Doctor Banner.

“Isn’t that one of my belts?” wondered out loud Fitz.

“Yes” was Simmons answer, she wasn’t even looking at him, instead she was looking at her idol ready to start fangirling again.

“You went into my room?” He asked in a tone between embarrassed and angry.

“My belts are too short and I don’t know where Hunter keeps his” she retorted.

“You would enter in my room? Just like that?” Hunter complained.

“Not that you really like that room...” Bobbi muttered.

“How do you know that?” asked Phil, suspicious, and started a discussion with both.

Meanwhile Banner had already put the belt on and was chatting about science with Simmons, Fitz and Daisy beside her, Daisy trying to get a word with the doctor about the control of powers.

May and Mack looked at each other and approached Phil and observed him. When he noticed, Phil looked at May questioningly. She pointed at Banner, Phil grimaced.

“Ah, yes” he mused, and went towards him.

“Hello” said Phil awkwardly. Banner cut off of his conversation with Skye about controlling powers.

“Hey, Director Coulson” he greeted “I got a bit sidetracked”

“You will not trash us around the plane right?” jumped Hunter before anyone could say anything else. The others froze, looking at Banner, who just laughed.

“I like to think that I have gained more control than that” he assured “Anyway, I have come here to warn you…”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Legolas, you’re not guilty!” declared Tony.

“What do you mean?” Clint asked confused while Natasha raised an eyebrow at the engineer.

“Your (controlled) actions didn’t cause as much death as you feared my friend!” claimed Tony, mimicking Thor rather poorly.

“Tony, just say what you mean” Natasha said drily.

“Ok, Agent is alive”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter in a few hours.


	3. STRIKE team: delta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the second chapter of today as promised. It's probably the only time this is gonna happen, so don't get used to it.

Coulson was walking through the Playground, when, out of nowhere, he saw a certain red-headed woman going directly towards him, with all the calm of the world. But he knew better, so the next second he was running in the opposite direction of where Natasha Romanoff was.  
Soon, he arrived at the common area, where all the team was doing their own things; they stopped when they saw the director entering the room. Then, he shut the door, pale as if he had seen a ghost.  
However, the door opened from outside, and Black Widow entered.  
Coulson jumped out of her way immediately, backing himself to the wall. Natasha had stooped and was staring at him.  
May and Bobbi smiled.  
Hunter fell to the ground from atop his chair, the beer he had been drinking soaking his t-shirt.  
FitzSimmons hid behind Mack, who was standing like a sweaty statue, completely still.  
Daisy couldn’t shield herself behind Mack, so she slowly approached May.  
Then, Natasha punched Coulson in the face, sending him to the wall. Everyone tensed.  
“Glad to see you, too” Coulson stammered.  
“That’s why you were running?” Bobbi questioned.  
“Excuse me if I don’t have the desire to die, again” he answered drily.  
“Wise course of action” mocked Natasha, sweetly “Not carried through well enough, sadly.”  
And then a trap door of one of the air ducts fell to the ground. Hawkeye was hanging from it with his legs holding him. Then, he shoot, with an arrow, at Coulson’s head.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“How did it go, Science Bro?” asked Tony to Bruce, when the latter returned at the tower.  
“I just warned them of the mayhem that will follow” answered the doctor, Tony chuckled.  
“Why did you do that? I would have loved to see Agent’s surprised face” pouted Tony.  
“I think that he and his team almost had a heart attack, if it satisfies you” informed Bruce.  
“Anyways, let’s contact ‘Point Break’” announced Tony with a smile.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

May widened her eyes a bit more than usually.  
Bobbi dropped her jaw.  
Hunter stood and moved towards Bobbi.  
Mack opened his arms to protect FitzSimons, who had gasped.  
Daisy dropped to a power-attacking stance.  
Black Widow and Hawkeye didn’t flinch even a bit.  
Then, Coulson stood, tearing the suction cup arrow from his forehead.  
“Was that necessary!?” the Director exclaimed.  
“Yes” said Clint with a smirk, while he jumped from the air duct.  
“Do I attack, or not!?” asked Daisy, still ready to take action.  
“Not necessary” May told her.  
“Well, that was terrifying” whimpered Hunter from behind Bobbi.  
“Long time no see, Natasha” she greeted, ignoring him.  
“Bobbi” nodded the spy “I didn’t realize it was you”  
“Glad to see that everyone had their guards up” sassed Coulson.  
“I’m still not used to him acting like this” commented Daisy, weirded out.  
“The Avengers bring out the best in me”  
“Even dying?” asked Natasha.  
Everyone went still once more.  
“That was harsh” commented Bobbi raising her eyebrows.  
“It wasn’t harsh, it was deserved” cut Clint bitterly “We had to find out via Tony effin’ Stark. So, explain”  
Coulson didn’t respond, he was too shocked.  
“NOW” ordered, raising her voice, Natasha.  
“It all started when S.H.I.E.L.D. started the T.A.H.I.T.I. project…” proceeded Phil, internally screaming.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Some minutes later, at the control room, Billy Koenig was watching the security footage.  
“Blimey! Intruders!” he said, standing up, without consulting the identity of said intruders “Director, we have intruders!”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“... and now here we are” finished Phil.  
“Director, there are intruders!” exclaimed Koenig from the door, making everyone in the room look at him “We should exp…” he started, his words dying when he saw the ‘intruders’ “...pulse… them…”.  
Both, Clint and Natasha (as if they had rehearsed it arched an eyebrow at unison.  
“Or, maybe not… GOODBYE!” and slammed the door shut, fleeing.  
In the common room May and Natasha smiled, almost snickering, the rest laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tune in next week for more. Don't forget to leave a comment.


	4. Lightning pop-tarts

Coulson was taking a sip of his coffee while doing paperwork in his office when someone knocked at the door, it was Daisy.

“Hey, DC, I have updated the security system” she informed, looking mentally exhausted.

“Great, you can go to re…”

BRAM!

Part of the ceiling fell in the office, almost falling on Daisy and filling everything with dust.

“ **SON OF COUL** !” a loud voice boomed, filling the office.  The dust soon dispersed and Thor, God of Lightning, was seen looking at the man behind the desk. He reached for him, to then, bear-hug the director

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” exclaimed Daisy looking from the broken ceiling to the god.

“Kidding!?” exclaimed Thor turning around almost aggressively, Coulson dangling from his hold, to face the girl. Daisy jumped, startled “I do not see any children around!” and with that, an awkward silence was made.

“I meant joking…” corrected Daisy.

“What “joke” do thou speak about?!”

“She means that you have bypassed ALL our security” May said from the doorframe “And broken the roof” she concluded.

Everyone looked upwards; a huge hole displayed the (thankfully) clear sky.

“I offer my apologies” said Thor, a bit crestfallen “This shall not happen again”.

“Ehem. Thor” said Coulson from between his arms “Could you let me go?”

Thor looked sadly at Coulson (who had the impression of having kicked a puppy) and dropped him gently.

“Thank you”

Then, the rest of the team plus Koenig arrived, Mai let them pass inside. They took a look around and  _ reacted _ .

Koenig approached Daisy slowly and hugged her, both of them were close to tears.

Simmons drooled while staring at Thor. Fitz looked at her indignated.

Hunter was between fanboying and running away. He settled for fanboying with Simmons.

Bobbi at her turn, followed Fitz’s example.

Mack facepalmed and threw his arms at the sky.

“Who are thee!?” asked Thor at the new-arrived, looking preoccupied for the hugging pair.

“My team” answered Coulson, throwing a disapproving glance at Simmons and Hunter.

“I am  _ honored  _ of meeting Son of Coul’s comrades!” exclaimed Thor with an huge grin.

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“Yes, Natasha?” asked Steve trough the phone “I see, thanks” and he ended the call.

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

When all of them had been presented and everything had been explained (minus Daisy’s powers and the origin of them), Thor stood up from a chair.

“It has been a pleasure to meet thou! In spite of this, I have to say my goodbyes!” he proclaimed while grabbing Mjolnir from his waist. Then, he strode forward until the hole at the ceiling was above his head.

“Wait!” Coulson approached him “Don’t be mad at Lady Sif, I asked her not to tell you about any of this.”

“Do not fret, my friend. My fury shall not fall upon Lady Sif” and then he exclaimed “Heimdall! Send me to the battle!”

“Step back!” bellowed Coulson, doing just that. And then the ceiling exploded with a flash of light, Thor disappeared.

“He hasn’t learned” declared Mai.

“I’m not cleaning that” Daisy and Koenig said in unison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always more next week


	5. Captain IPod

The team was at the common room in the playground, for a while they had been discussing playfully about the “Avengers invasion” (like Hunter had been calling it).

“We have met five of them, that leaves…” said Bobbi.

“The Captain!” ended Coulson terrified.

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

Meanwhile, at the ‘front door’ Koenig was welcoming the man in question, plus an unexpected friend.

“I warn you of that, before it is allowed for you two to go further inside, you have to ‘pass a test’”

“What!? I haven’t studied!” protested Darcy.

“Not that kind of test”

The room was an unnerving gray, the table and the chairs metallic.

“Who’s first?” asked Koenig.

Darcy pointed at Steve, who just smiled.

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“Can I have your full name?”

_ “Steven Grant Rogers” _

“Eye color?”

_ “Blue-Green” _

“Have you ever been married?”

_ “No” _

“Please list your immediate family.”

_ “Sarah Rogers and Joseph Rogers, both death.” _

“What's the difference between an egg and a rock?”

_ “Mmmm… One is frail, while the other is not” _

“Have you ever heard of project Insight?”

_ “Yes, Director Fury told me about it. And some friends and I destroyed it” _

“Ever had any contact with Alexander Pierce?”

_ “Yes, he was (is?) Hydra” _

“You wash up on a deserted island alone. Sitting on the sand is a box. What is in that box?”

_ “Swimsuit” _

“S.H.I.E.L.D. no longer exists. The agency has been labeled a terrorist organization. So why are you here?”

_ “To find a friend” _

“Are you associated with Hydra?”

_ “I’m not” _

“Are you Hydra?”

_ “No” _

“Do you have another agenda here?”

_ “None” _

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“Can I have your full name?”

_ “Yeah, it is ‘Darcy Lewis’” _

“Eye color?”

_ “Blue” _

“Have you ever been married?”

_ “Nooop.” _

“Please list your immediate family.”

_ “Jane Foster and Erik Selvig, maybe Thor like a big bro” _

“What's the difference between an egg and a rock?”

_ “The first I can break with my IPod, the second breaks it.” _

“Ever had any contact with Alexander Pierce?”

_ “That’s not the bloke that commanded Hydra? Not that I know” _

“You wash up on a deserted island alone. Sitting on the sand is a box. What is in that box?”

_ “Mew-mew” _

“What is that?”

_ “Thor’s unpronounceable weapon”. _

“S.H.I.E.L.D. no longer exists. The agency has been labeled a terrorist organization. So why are you here?”

_ “To recuperate my IPod and cause a tiny bit of chaos.” _

“Are you associated with Hydra?”

_ “No” _

“Are you Hydra?”

_ “Nooooooo” _

“Do you have another agenda here?”

_ “Does going to the bathroom count?” _

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

Coulson was visibly freaking out and his team was fighting their laughter back, his idolization of the Captain was at the level of the cosplayers in front of Stark Tower.

Mai coughed, Coulson was still inside his world of suffering, she coughed louder, still not a response.

“Director” she said with a tone of finality.

“WHAT!?!?!?” everyone jumped when he shouted.

“You need to calm down” she responded calmly.

“I AM COMPLETELY CALM!!” he responded, the others looked at him incredulous.

“I can see that” sassed Daisy.

Then, someone knocked at the door and Koenig entered, followed by…

“Captain...” murmured Coulson with a puppy look and very wide eyes.

“Murphy’s law is real” mumbled Fitz.

Something moved behind the Captain, and a head appeared.

“IPod thief!” exclaimed its owner “Return it to me!”

“I can’t believe you are here too” Coulson said faintly.

“IPod thief?” asked Steve, disconcerted.

“Yes! He took it with Jane’s research when Thor was searching Mew-mew!”

“I returned everything after Thor left! And Its name is Mjolnir!” stated Coulson.

“Liar! My IPod wasn’t there!”

Then an agent passed by dancing at the tune of the music he was listening to with an IPod…

“Ei! That’s my IPod!”

“Agent Zhu! Give back this device to Miss Lewis!” ordered Coulson.

“But it has the best playlist!” Zhu pleaded.

“I will pass it to you” Darcy promised.

“My hero!” he exclaimed and hugged her “Marry me!”

“Nah, my only love is pop culture” Darcy said while returning the hug.

Agent Zhu let out a whine and got out the room running dramatically.

“What just happened?” asked Mack.

“Alien stuff” said Hunter.

“Ei!” protested Daisy.

Steve and the others were speechless.

“Why me?” said Coulson.

“It doesn’t matter now” announced Steve seriously “We have somethings to discuss”

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“Thank you for investigating, Tony” said Pepper tiredly, he smiled at her.

“Yeah, he’s in for some hell now…”

“I think I’m going to rest for a while” commented while turning around to leave.

“Oh! By the way, tomorrow eyepatch will come”

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“Sir, do you remember that tomorrow you have a meeting with Stark about his battle availability?”

“Yes” he said gruffly “It will be a nightmare”.

 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

 

“...” Steve was silent while thinking about all Coulson had explained to him.

“Holy shit” said Darcy “It must be super-easy to make milkshakes with that power”.

“...I haven’t tried” laughed Daisy.

“Do NOT try” pleaded Mack.

“Why not?”

“You could semi-destroy the base again” he reprimanded.

“That was one time! And I control my powers now”

“As fascinating as this conversation is… Are you all sure that Hydra has been dealt with?” interrupted the argument Steve.

“No” denied Coulson “There is still one higher-up”

“Gideon Malick” said May.

“Call the Avengers if you need help” offered the Captain.

“And if the Avengers need anything, we will try to help them” said Coulson, his team and Koenig nodded.

“Uhmm… I feel a bit out of place” said Darcy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next one is the last so enjoy while you can


	6. Attack on Fury

The elevator doors opened, a red-headed woman exited it and started walking towards the office, not paying attention to the people that were in her way, she simply strode past them and, when she saw Agent Coulson, Pepper Potts walked in his direction, stopped in front of him, slapped him and continued towards the office as if she hadn’t stopped.

Once inside, the CEO of SI ignored the fact that the avengers where in the room, shouting, and went to where Nick Fury was standing, then punched him in the face.

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Sometime before that...

“Mr. Nick Fury has entered the building, sir” said FRIDAY to Tony using the speakers in the lab.

Tony perked up and smiled evilly.

“That’s so? Then notify the team of our company, and I think that Agent’s team deserves being there too, let Hacker Jr. inform herself of this visit” he said merrily.

“You are evil, Tony” informed Bruce, pausing his research for the moment.

“Not evil, Bruce, just mischievous” contradicted Tony while opening a drawer and taking a watch the color of his armor from inside.

Bruce chuckled disbelievingly and opened the door for Tony; both exited the lab and headed towards the office that was used as a meeting room for the Avengers and SHIELD.

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“What!?” exclaimed Daisy, looking at the screen of her laptop and went to the Director’s office “DC!”.

“Yes, Sk-Daisy?” he asked calmly.

“I was looking into Stark’s schedule of the day and THAT popped up” she informed, showing him her laptop. Coulson paled slightly.

“If we do nothing, the United States might implode... May! We are going to New York right now!” he urged “Bobbi, with us!” and turned around to face Daisy again “You come too”.

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“Have you thought, Mr. Stark, that we have work to do and with so much people in the same room it will take AGES to finish what we need to discuss?” asked Fury with gruffly, all the avengers plus him and Maria Hill were in the conference room and the atmosphere was very strained.

“And, have you thought, eyepatch, that TAHITI is a magical place?” asked Tony, Maria Hill and Fury straightened, alarmed.

“How do you know about that, Stark!?” roared Fury.

“Well, you know, the usual: Someone sees another someone that is supposed to be dead and then, when they realize that other people see him and it’s not their imagination, this someone goes straight to me for investigation. What do I find? Extremely dangerous experimentation in league with my usual craziness, only that the investigators were not as good and that the bad possibilities had not been explored first. Plus, someone lied, when it was necessary yes, but continued lying when it wasn’t anymore” ranted Tony, without raising his voice once.

Fury shut up, this was serious.

“I would like to know why you, or Coulson, said nothing” added Steve. Fury exhaled.

“TAHITI was a secret, your reactions needed to be genuine” he declared, Steve nodded, still not content with the answer.

“So, the reason is our lack of acting skills” rebuked Clint with a frown “Because two trained Agents couldn’t fake sadness in a funeral and, after that, inform the rest” he retorted angrily. Natasha didn’t say anything, but it wasn’t needed to know that she agreed.

“Do thou affirm ...!?” exclaimed Thor indignantly “...that thou do not have certainty in that your warriors  _ will _ kept this secret!? A commander should entrust their soldiers with matters that are of their utmost interest” the heir of Asgard’s throne declared.

Then, the door opened and Pepper Potts walked steadily, with elegance and determination, until she was in front of Nick Fury and proceeded to punch him to the face. From the door some gasps were heard and, when the Avengers turned towards it, they saw Coulson and three of the women in his team looking inside with their mouths agape. Coulson had a red mark with the form of a hand over his face.

“What the hell!?” both, Daisy and Clint, asked, breaking the awkward silence that had formed.

“Language” said Steve with a deadpan. The Avengers looked at him sarcastically, in Tony’s case scandalized “Sorry, it was automatic” he apologized. Everyone else just watched them feeling out of the loop.

“Had you something to do with that?” asked Pepper to Maria Hill icily.

“I knew that he was alive” she answered simply.

“Alright” said Pepper, understanding that she was under orders of not saying anything.

“I knew I had a reason to not cross her” said Tony, sending a glance to Bruce while raising an eyebrow. Coulson nodded.

“You and everyone else Stark” commented Natasha.

From the doorway Bobbi and May looked at her. Daisy didn’t understand anything. Meanwhile the rest of Avengers gave sounds of agreement.

“Has the crisis ended now?” asked Daisy in general “Because you know, we have work to do” and looked at Thor pointedly. Thor didn’t notice.

“Who are you?” asked Pepper, turning around, the ones in front of her flinched “And they?” she said, and signaled at May and Bobbi.

“Agents Daisy Johnson, Melinda May and Bobbi Morse” answered Coulson. Pepper glared at him.

“Pleased to meet you” she said, the three nodded at her, then she turned towards Coulson “What’s your excuse to not have said anything,  _ friend _ ?”.

“We were dismantling Hydra”.

Pepper furrowed her eyebrows and pursed her lips, but nodded drily.

“Okay! Now everyone to the Shawarma!” exclaimed Tony and exited the room. Some seconds of hesitance latter, the rest followed.

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“And that's how it has gone” reported Daisy to the rest of the team, an incredulous silence followed that words.

“After all this chaos…” said Hunter “...it ended with eating fast food!? And you didn’t invite us to eat!?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this until the end.  
> This series will have a new one-shot once in a while so if you don't want to miss it subcribe to the series and enjoy.


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